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Recently our HR has been auditing job applications of our current employees. We found out that a few of them lied on their applications.  All of them lied on the same question. Have you ever committed a crime, or been convicted of a felony. So me and my partner who will be known as Jefe, had to take care of 2 guys.

It is D-Day, me and Jefe show up early. We have to meet up with our HR and go over the paper work, and make sure everything is in order for the terminations. I asked our HR what exactly showed up on “Jesse’s” background check? She just replied that it was REALLY bad. Kind of strange, since I have been with the company Jesse has been one of the nicest and best employees we have.

Jesse rolls into work and Jefe goes to the breakroom to let him know we needed to see him. Jesse comes in the room and we let him know what was going on. It went pretty well suprisingly. Apparently our GM had talked to him about his infraction a week before. So Jesse knew it was coming. Jesse then asks what showed up on the check? Our HR tells him a lot, he asks if the Arson, and stalking charges showed up. She said yes and a lot more!!! WTF?!!! Next time tell me that the muthafucka I am terminating is a fucking psycho and might come back and kill me. Shit you putting my life in danger.

After it was all taken care of, we walked Jesse out and gave him our best. He was a damn good worker, I was kind of pissed that we were losing him. So we head back into the HR’s office and chat with her for a minute. She pulls out his background check and well dude is lucky he is a free man. This is the list of charges the best I could remember. Arson, 3 gun charges, stalking, attempted murder, grand theft auto, car jacking, oh yeah and another arson.

Apparently most of this happened before the 3 strikes law went into effect, cuz if this happened after 1990 then he would definitely be doing 25 to life. But he does have 2 strikes on him now. Plus he did a total of 15 years in prison over the course of 4 or 5 bids. Thankfully he seems to be a changed man. I really dont like the idea of having to look over my shoulder every time I leave the building.

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I always like walking around the office and looking at how people decorate their cubicles. Usually you have pictures of kids, drawings your kids did, maybe a calendar with kittens, and some times you get cool action figures. I don’t spend much time in my cubicle, so I don’t have shit in it. I have a phone, my LCD, a sticky note pad, and that’s it. I have been meaning to pimp it out. Maybe throw a Dodgers calendar in there or something.

But take this cubicle below, it seems normal enough. She is representing her favorite football team. The standard school picture’s of her children. Looks like a few office memo’s hanging, can’t forget about the new covers for your TPS reports. Also what looks like literature or a crossword book for lunch time. Then what do we have here is that her bachelors degree?

Lets take a closer look.

Yep she has her good enough diploma displayed proudly for all to see. I mean hooray for her for going back to school and getting it done. But having the damn thing hanging in your office is not whats hot in the streets. Whats next your license plate making certificate from that 3 year bid you did up north?

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Sorry for not updating the blog in a while. I have had a lot of shit to deal with out here in the real world. Times in the warehouse have been tough. The company hasn’t been profitable since the start of the calendar year, and we were recently sold. All of this and just being stuck with no where to grow led to me looking for greener pastures.

Since the beginning of the year I have been on a search for a new job. I sent my resume out EVERYWHERE, and couldn’t get a serious call back for the life of me. I figured people would be blowing up my phone with offers with my experience. I was wrong, the job market is rough right now. There are 20 guys like me or better looking to work at the same places I was applying for. I know I can get any job I interview for, but the problem was getting to an interview.

But perseverance paid off. After 2 offers that had to be jokes, I got a serious offer. So I just finished out my 2 week notice in HELL, and start a new life. Now I am getting paid what I am worth, no more 70 hour work weeks, and finally a company with some structure.

Yes I know you are wondering what is going to happen to this wonderful planet you have created in the universe known as the internet? Hopefully nothing. I am just moving to another warehouse. Through talking with other people in my position in the industry, all warehouses have crazies. I will still give you guys updates from the old job. I easily have another 20 or so that I haven’t shared. Its all about sitting down and typing them out.

So don’t you worry. I am sure this new bunch of employees will give me even more stories. Plus its a chance for you all to meet up with some new characters.

So check up on me from time to time. Don’t give up on me just yet. Thanks for reading and may the force be with you.

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So earlier I was out in our yard doing a check on trailers. I smell something burning. We have an ashtray outside and sometimes they forget to empty it and the cigarette butts catch on fire. So I walk over to the ash tray to put out the fire, and nothing. So I follow my nose © tucan sam. The smoke is coming from the parking lot. Hmmm maybe someone’s car is over heating. I start checking all the cars and I see one filled with smoke. One of my warehouse guys. I get on my walkie talkie and let my lead inside know to tell dude his car was smoking from the inside. That dude comes running out with a fire extinguisher. He opens the door and no fire. Just a whole lot of smoke coming off of his door. We sprayed the inside of his door with the extinguisher. Let it sit for a few minutes until the smoke clears. His whole door panel is melted. All the plastic is deformed and most of it melted down into the little pocket on the inside of the door.

Turns out he smokes in his car and we think an ash fell in his door and lit a stack of papers he had in there. I didn’t catch it until an hour after he clocked in. So the fire must have burnt for a solid hour + before I noticed it. Hes lucky the seat and upholstery didn’t catch on fire. Sadly I have no pics 😦

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This is the 2nd post in my new home. The other is down there *points below*. But I came to wordpress because it had a few more options that blogger didn’t have. Plus I like the templates a lot better. Since I am not CSS savvy I am pretty much stuck with whatever they offer for free. But one of the new things I wanted to point out is the employees listing in the right column. Basically click that pull down menu and click on your favorite employee and it will bring up all of his stories. Thought it was a pretty cool feature. Anyways this is my new home, forget the other link place I will be deleting it within the next month.

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dude that moves trailers around for me at night, just came and told me he saw some dude standing in the middle of our back parking lot, and some chick was on her knee’s dropping knowledge. IN THE MIDDLE OF AN EMPTY PARKING LOT!! He told dude to leave, dude told him 1 minute. Then he said he was calling the cops, so they ran off. Man I swear this shit is out of control.

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So this driver who has an appointment to deliver tomorrow morning gets here early. He comes to my office and asks if we could unload his shit tonight. I told him no, his appointment is tomorrow @ 8am, so thats when he will get unloaded.

So dude walks out then comes right back in and asks if he can leave his trailer here for a few hours. I told him no, I don’t want to be responsible for his trailer.

So dude walks out again and comes back in. Hey do you know where I can buy some pussy? What? Do you know where I can buy some pussy? I cant wait until tomorrow for pussy, I need some right now.

I have been working in the transportation industry for 4 years now. Truck drivers getting prostitutes is a running joke around here. But I have never had someone ask me where to find some girls at. I either I look like someone who has to pay for sex, or he just does not give a fuck. I think I will go with the latter.

So I direct him to one of the infamous hoe strolls in our area, told him to be careful because the cops do stings every weekend. He thanked me and went on his way, and just dropped his trailer on the street and left. Lucky for him he returned before we went home for the night so my yard guy was able to keep an eye on it for him.

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